Grow your comfort zone…

So, I went for my first psychologist appointment a couple of days ago.  What a whirlwind of thoughts going through my  mind.  Stop.

Stop.

Think.

Feel.

Be true to myself.

I have been thinking about a number of things that were discussed during my session.  The following are definitely true:

  • I need to start saying NO when I can’t do something, or don’t want to do something.

I am, and always have been a people pleaser.  Why?  Because I don’t want others to feel sad, let down, like they aren’t a priority to someone, that someone doesn’t care….  I am learning that I can’t always please everyone.  The more I try to split myself, th

e less I can do.  The more I try to bend over backwards for everyone else, the less I can focus on what’s truly important in MY life.  By no means am I going to stop being there for my friends and family – that’s not who I am.  I AM a caring person.  I am a helpful person. I choose to be. But I need to start prioritising me, my immediate family, and our goals.  Saying no does not make me mean, it does not mean that I don’t care.  It just means that at that time, no, I can’t.

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  • I need to prioritise me more and set out my goals

I have goals.  Short term goals, long term goals, life goals…. And if I don’t start to prioritise me more, then I will never reach those goals.  If I don’t set aside time for me to study and make it clear to people that this is MY time to do MY thing, they won’t take me or my goals seriously.

  • My  comfort zone

I told my psychologist that I was trying to get out of my comfort zone – for example, I did a zipline recently.  It was short. It lasted all of about 20 seconds.  But I did it. I jumped off that pier and absolutely loved (almost) every second of it.  For some people it may sound silly, but I don’t care. I’m scared to hurt myself.  So, I’m now determined to do a handstand. And jump over a little ditch which I never would have.  But she made an interesting point to me.  And I like it.  Why am I trying to get OUT of my comfort zone?  Shouldn’t I rather be expanding my comfort zone?  Inviting things IN TO my comfort zone?  Yes, I think I like that better.  I feel like I have more control by saying that. I can still feel “safe” and not like I’m vulnerable –  because it is ME who is in control.

comfort

It’s been a good week with some interesting changes.  I can see these points working.

You cannot pour from an empty jug. You have to look after yourself if you want to provide holistically for your children.  While making a living is important…don’t forget that you also need too make a LIFE.

♥ L

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